Just came back from visiting two people at the hospital on the same day, sigh. One of them is my relative and the other one is none other than my baby boy :( It was sucha sudden operation but he should be fine already. Luckily, it was just a minor one. Was totally shocked when he told me he just had an operation after me spamming him texts the whole afternoon during his checkup period. This boy really loves to make me worry, tskkkkkk! But it was not his fault cause he couldn't even use his phone then :( I was worry sick and couldn't even pay attention in school. Called for a cab and immediately rushed down to the hospital to see him, heart pain was all i felt.
Looking at him lying on the bed, couldn't move much due to the pain, etc. His parents, his friends and even my parents went to visit him at different timings, haha like taking turns. Glad that his friends made him laughed and also laughed at him to make the atmosphere less serious. Hahah i had a great time laughing as well. However, everytime they leave the ward, he would turn to me with his tired and sad face, calling out to me and I could even see tears welling up in his eyes but he would always close them in time before it even had the chance to roll down. What else would i feel other than heartache? And when i lamented that he didn't tell me whatever happened today specifically, he just said that he don't want me to worry and make sobs sounds.... sigh how to be mad at him? Without doubts, i cried as well. Infront of him and in the toilet, so sad!!! :( Sometimes really detest my incapability to hold back my tears.... He is so silly, I guess he was just traumatised and scared by this first time encounter with the ambulance + operation. How i wish i could stay with him in the hospital tonight but yah ofc cannot lah, furthermore, he is going to be discharged tmr! Hopefully he will pass the scan and get discharged tmr if not i know he is gonna be sad again and i hate that.
Looking at all the sick patients in the hospital, it just made my heart ache as usual. Not only are the patients suffering in some ways, their loved ones are also suffering emotionally. In the end, nothing is more important than health. When it comes to his health I'm always very particular, haha you can asked him and he will say I'm always nagging at him but that's because his health is my main priority in the relationship. Or rather his health and his happiness. I can give up mine as long as he is safe and happy. This is not me being magnanimous or kind but you will feel me when you are in love to a deeper extent. I feel like we have overcame so many obstacles, been on quite a few emotional roller coasters tgt and crossed so many milestones tgt. We seldom quarrel so all those obstacles and emotional roller coasters were not about our relationship but rather personal ones that we chose to face them tgt, to support each other through hard and dark times. It feels like we are so old tgt already and these experiences are what kept us tgt. I love him for everything and definitely not due to that familiarity for being in the relationship for quite long already. Whenever I'm serious mad at him, I'll ponder that I have so many choices and chances out there so why not leave? Since alot of couples out there made leaving each other look so simple..... however, I can't help it but to find myself back to him again. He is my ultimate choice till date and hopefully all the way till the future.
Sorry for the sudden blabberings and thoughts. Right now all i care about is to receive good news from him that he can discharge tmr. Rest well my beloved, iloveyousomuchhhhhh! I'll always be there for you :')
No comments:
Post a Comment